Complicated
by Reese Cup
Summary: Short little sonfic I came up with in 30 minutes. :-) HM
1. Default Chapter

(Takes place after the Paraguay incident.This is just a little songfic to help me get over my writers block. I haven't forgotten about my other story, but I'm having a lot of trouble thinking of more ideas.)  
  
Disclaimer: JAG does not belong to me. Neither does the song "Complicated" by Carolyn Dawn Johnson  
  
McMurphy's Bar  
  
How many times have I been down this road? I think I really blew it this time. He came all the way to Paraguay to find me. He gave up his career. He gave up everything just for me. And how do I repay him?. I go and get myself involved with Clay. Of course, I'm not really in a relationship with Clay. When I kissed him, I was just kissing a friend goodbye. I didn't know if he would live and that was my way of thanking him. I just don't think Clay knows that. I just don't know what to do. Those were the thoughts running through Mac's head as she walked into McMurphry's bar. Everyone from JAG was gathered there, for a friendly get-together.  
  
"Hello Mac." Admiral Cheggwidden said, walking up behind her. "I see I'm not the only one a little late."  
  
Mac laughed. "No sir." she said, "Traffic?"  
  
The admiral nodded. "Tons." he said.  
  
Mac smiled and excused herself, walking to the bar. She wasn't really in the mood for small talk now. She looked behind her and saw Harm and Renee talking in a corner, their heads bowed together. They were laughing. They look so happy. Mac thought wistfully. She sighed and looked around at the other members of JAG, all so happy and carefree. Her eyes fell on a sign that said "Karaoke Night". She looked up at the mike thoughtfully. Maybe...she thought, Maybe I can get his attention here, like this. She walked up to the stage, and talked for a moment with the man in charge. He nodded and she walked up on stage.  
  
Meanwhile, Harm was standing with Bud, acting happy. In truth, he was miserable. The woman he wanted to be with had no interest in him. He sighed and let his eyes wander the room. They stopped when he saw Mac ascend on stage. What's she up to? he wondered.  
  
"Umm, excuse me." Mac said into the microphone. Everyone looked up at her. "I'd like to dedicate this song to a close friend of mine. Hopefully, he'll know what I mean." Her eyes traveled the room, lingering for a moment on Harm. I must be crazy. She thought. But it's too late to stop now. She cleared her throat nervously as the music began playing.  
  
I'm so scared that the way I feel,  
  
Is written all over my face  
  
When you walk into the room,  
  
I wanna find a hiding place.  
  
We used to laugh, we used to hug, the way that old friends do.  
  
But now, a smile and a touch of your hand,  
  
Just makes me come unglued.  
  
Such a contradiction, do I lie or tell the truth.  
  
Is it fact or fiction,  
  
Oh the way I feel for you.  
  
So complicated, I'm so frustrated.  
  
I wanna hold you close, I wanna push you away,  
  
I wanna make you go, I wanna make you stay.  
  
Should I say it.  
  
Should I tell you how I feel.  
  
Oh, I want you to know.  
  
But then again I don't. It's so complicated.  
  
Oh... just when I think I'm under control.  
  
I think I got a grip.  
  
Another friend tells me that, I'm always on your lips.  
  
They say I'm more than just a friend, they say I must be blind.  
  
Well, I admit that I've seen you watch me from the corner of your eye.  
  
Oh, It's so confusing. I wish you'd just confess.  
  
But think of what I'd  
  
Be losin', if your answer isn't yes.  
  
So complicated I'm so frustrated,  
  
I wanna hold you close, I wanna push you away,  
  
I wanna make you go, I wanna make you stay.  
  
Should I say it, should I tell you how I feel.  
  
Oh I want you to know, but then again I don't, It's so complicated.  
  
Oh, I hate it. 'Cuz I've waited.  
  
So long for someone like you  
  
Oh, what do I do.  
  
Oh should I say it.  
  
Should I tell you how I feel.  
  
I want you to know, but then again I don't.  
  
It's so complicated...  
  
It's so complicated...  
  
It's so complicated.  
  
Ohh... The bar was silent for a minute, as everyone took in what had happened. Then it suddenly burst into applause, people cheering and whistling. Mac took no notice of this, and looked only at Harm, whose eyes were wide with realization. When he made no move to come towards her, Mac ran from the stage outside. She didn't cry until she got outside, and then she sobbed. I should have known he didn't feel the same way. She thought unhappily, I'm such a fool. She suddenly felt a hand on her shoulder. "Did you mean it?" he asked. "Did you really mean what you said?" Mac didn't even have to look up to know who was talking. "Every word." She whispered. "Every single word." Harm grasped her hand, pulling her into his arms. "Tell me how you really feel." he said softly. Mac looked up into his eyes. "I love you." she whispered, "So very much." Harm pulled her into a long, passionate kiss. "I love you too." he said, wiping her tears away. "Forever."  
  
(Awww....fluff! Please read and review!) 


	2. Oops!

Oops! I made a mistake in this story! Renee wasn't supposed to be included. I got in too much of a hurry when re-reading it, and I forgot to take her out. Thank you to my wonderful reviewers for pointing it out! You're all great! 


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